Floored

Posted on Fri Dec 27th, 2024 @ 3:17pm by Lieutenant Axod Qo & Lieutenant Irynya

Mission: Mean Green Queen
Location: Counselor’s Office
Timeline: Mission Day 6 at 0800

Since the ooey gooey situation in sickbay, Axod made a point to schedule some time with Irynya. He had seen first hand just how affected she was in that situation and wanted to check in with her. He wanted it to be very comfortable so he lit some incense, set up two very cozy meditation pillows to sit on and turned on some relaxing white noise. He himself dressed comfortably in his civilian clothes, not wanting her to feel like this was a session with the shrink but rather a nice chat with Ax. The looks copper fabric flowed around him, almost resembling molten metal. He lowered himself to the floor and took one of the pillows to seat himself.

Closing his eyes, he took a few moments to calm and centre himself before Iry's impending arrival.

Waking up in the four person bunked space that constituted the enlisted quarters she and her roommates had been assigned had been disorienting not only because she was somewhere different, but because Irynya had felt unsettled. Her roommates were up and off doing things and the enlisted roommates, while quiet, just didn't feel easy to connect with. Maybe a trauma response? She rarely didn't find it easy to connect with someone. Still, she'd been quick about the shared showers, and with a quick cup of coffee and breakfast.

After yesterday's intensity she had scheduled time with Axod Qo to check in--something she'd gotten much better about since Noah had first walked her to the counselor's office after claustrophobic anxiety nearly got the better of her coming off of bridge duty.

Truthfully she didn't feel like going. But she reminded herself that she never did when it was a good idea and that, alone, should tell her that she ought to go. Besides... there was no rest for an Acting Chief whose superior had just left in stasis on a shuttle. She might have been given leave not to work yesterday, but today there would be a lot to do.

Standing in front of the counselor's door she adjusted the long tunic-like dress she wore. It came down to midway across her calves so that the pants she wore underneath didn't show. If she was going to have to talk through the prior days events she at least wanted to be comfortable for it. With a deep fortifying breath she stepped forward and into the door sensor setting off a chime to alert the room's occupant of her arrival.

"Come in!" Axod called, opening his eyes and standing from his spot. As the doors hissed apart, he took a few steps towards them. "Glad you were able to come so early." He remarked with a smile. In his experience, very few in Starfleet were willing to see an counselor willingly, let alone have an appointment before lunch. " Why don't you come in and make yourself comfortable."

Offering the counselor a tired smile, Iry stepped into the room, eyes roving around it. "Honestly early was better for my work schedule. Having the real Chief Helmsman out of commission and off ship doesn't really allow me the same room for crises of this scale." She sighed, shrugging and moving into the space dropping gracefully into one of the two meditation pillows. It wasn't that she'd never met with Qo before, but it was certainly true that her visits had decreased in frequency since the incident that led her to see Bracco's help in the first place. Up until the day prior she would have considered herself in maintenance mode. Now...

"Is that..." she tried to place the calming smell of the incense. It was familiar and also not, as if she were smelling a new flavor of something she'd encountered numerous times in her life.

"It's Bergamot and Risian Lemon. I thought you might find it comforting. I always try to use bright scents in the morning for alertness." He smiled as he lowered himself onto the pillow opposite her's. "If you'd prefer no scent, I can have the air purged and purified." He offered. It was, after all, presumptuous of him to have incense lit without the consent of his guest.

"No, it's lovely," she said and meant it even if the sudden olfactory connection made her ache for home. "It's a treat to find a piece of home when it wasn't expected." She drew in a deep breath letting the sharpness of the lemon and the earthiness of the bergamot mingle inside her nose and at the back of her mouth before letting it out slowly. "You know that most people expect Risian lemons to be sour," she commented in an offhand way. "I've been told by a few folks that they remind them of lemon candy. I suppose one of the funny things about looking for commonality between cultures. Sometimes we impress our own memories on objects that don't hold them."

Axod adjusted his position and crossed his legs beneath him. He nodded, not surprised by Iry's insights. "I've found that familiar scents can help relaxation and really put people at ease. So I like to try to tailor my incense or candles depending on who I'm seeing each day." He gestured toward Iry with a warm smile. "So why don't we start with you telling me why we're here?" He asked.

Iry frowned at that request, not because she didn't want to explain, but because getting started was always hard. "Because I nearly got... absorbed... by a mimetic lifeform in my own quarters?" she said, somewhat flippantly before sighing. "Because I panicked. Specifically. While nearly getting absorbed by a mimetic lifeform. And I guess I know by now that waiting to check in after panic isn't a good choice. So... Yeah..." The rest was delivered looking at her hands where they sat in her lap, one hand picking at the nails on the other.

"We're here because of a mimetic lifeform?" It took everything to supress a smirk at how she had described the precipitating events. "You mentioned panic. Are panic attacks something you've dealt with in the past?' He had read the relevant files that Doctor Bracco had left, but thought that allowing Iry to share her own past would be beneficial to fostering their counselling relationship.

Nodding, Irynya glanced up at him, not exactly lifting her head, but scanning to gauge his reaction. She suspected he must surely already know the answer, but since he was asking she answered all the same. "Yes. Since the last mission on the Adelphi. I don't get them all the time, but small enclosed spaces are... not great." She frowned down at her hands, the skin of her brow creasing slightly. "The last time I experienced them was triggered by getting locked in a sonic shower." This she delivered with a strong dose of self deprecation. It sounded so stupid when she said it out loud.

Axod understood ."You know, claustrophobia is actually very common. Especially in deep space crews." He picked up a nearby PADD. "There was a rather interesting journal published about the effects of claustrophobia in deep space." He scrolled the PADD for a moment. "Might be worth a read." He handed the PADD to Iry, then returned to the issue at hand. "So you've said you haven't had panic attacks for some time. Do you have exercises that you do to help with them?"

Nodding, Irynya accepted the PADD, setting it on the ground next to her before pressed her thumb into the meaty muscle below the same digit on her opposing hand. She massaged it, digging the pad of her thumb into the muscle while her other fingers wrapped the back of her hand and wrist stabilizing. "I use grounding," she said, chewing the inside of her lip for a moment. "Some times with a friend... with Noah... and sometimes by myself. It works better with help. I always feel kind of silly doing it by myself." She released her hand and reached up to the small curved bone behind her hear and tapped it lightly with her pointer finger. "And tapping. I don't know if it's expressly supposed to work on Risians, but it's something I learned from Noah too." Her hands dropped back to her lap and she engulfed one thumb between the opposing thumb and forefinger, rubbing some more. "The rhythm helps. I like to do it with breathing exercises I learned from Dr. Bracco."

She sighed, releasing the hand she'd been rubbing and finally looking up. "I've taken medication before too to help get them stabilized. It just seems like they're triggered at the most random times. Usually dreams with them. But just..." She shrugged, the self deprecation still lingering in her movements, "I don't like when suddenly my ability to cope in a crisis falls apart like that."

"Loss of control can be scary." Axod said, smiling a warm comforting smile. "I'm glad to hear you have some techniques you use to help when these situations come up." He wanted to zero in on something else she had just said, he wasn't sure it it was significant or not, but the fact that she mentioned it so specifically meant something. "Why don't you tell me a bit about your friend, Noah. It sounds like he's been with you through a lot."

This question made Iry look up, cheeks pinking slightly though she couldn't for the life of her imagine why. She shrugged, smiling despite herself. "Noah's my best friend," she said simply then, when the counselor didn't seem in a hurry to say more she filled the silence. "Ummm... he figured out the claustrophobia and confronted me about it after the whole shower thing... that..." Her mind drew a very clear picture of what had led to that moment and the tiniest bit of nostalgic mischief lit her eyes. "That was a sort of unfortunate social gaffe that led to an even more unfortunate technical failure." She squirmed slightly, the mischief fading to discomfort. "I was showering in the gym showers for... a couple weeks... They're open so it wasn't as scary and..." She shrugged again. "Noah figured it out and asked me about it and then got me to Bracco for help. And... I don't know... we do a lot together. He's a good friend."

Ax's smile stayed on his face. "It's really good to hear that you have a solid support system." He said, making a quick note on his PADD. "Having someone who can tell when something is up with us, even when we're trying to conceal it, is a rare gift. It seems to me that you have a pretty good understanding of what's going on with you, and that this recent episode isn't necessarily a common occurrence." He paused and tilted his head. "If it's okay with you, I'd like to carve out some time, not super frequently, but regular enough for us to keep up to date on how you're feeling. Does that sound okay?"

Irynya wanted to know what Qo had written about Noah on his PADD. Or maybe it was just about her. About her having a best friend to rely on. But, of course, that would have been an odd thing to ask, particularly as the counselor was suggesting they set a regular meeting time and had already moved past the topic. So instead of asking she said, "Sure. I make the duty roster for Flight Control right now so we can probably just set time and I'll work around it."

A small part of her was relieved. Somehow having the ship's counselor tell her that this didn't look like a common occurrence settled some of the discomfort she felt over the panic that had consumed her so readily yesterday. Yes, she had panicked, but maybe that was ok on some small level. Still, at the back of her mind she couldn't help the niggling doubt that she might somehow run straight into this problem at an even higher stakes moment. And the next time would someone actually die because of her panic? Her lips pressed into a thin line at the thought. "Is... is there anything I should try between now and when we next meet? I mean... I was lucky this time. We were on the ship and help was available, but..." she trailed off, eyes dropping once again to her hands. "I may not always have the luxury of help."

Ax placed his hands on his knees. He nodded and some of his red hair fell from its place in his coif. "Something I use personally when I start to feel some anxiety or panic coming on, I look around and find 3 objects in my surrounding area, then I listen for 3 sounds, and finally move 3 body parts. It helps to focus me and keep me grounded and in the moment. " He smiled warmly.

She nodded. Grounding. It was something familiar, but also reassuring to have it reaffirmed. "And if I'm not in a position to pause?" she asked, almost tentatively as her brain dredged forth an image of gelatinous tentacles extending toward her face. "I mean... like if I'm in the thick of a crisis."

“Close your eyes, take a deep breath.” Axod shifted to a more comfortable position. “That’s where I like to start. Focus on your breathing and keeping it consistent.” He smiled. Back when he was a child, his father dealt with anxiety as well. Even Axod, himself, had some personal experience. He knew it was different for everyone. “Let’s try something between now and our next meeting. Can you keep a log of any anxiety you might feel, and the rough duration of the feeling and also the likely cause? That way we can check out the trends together and make a plan.”

Irynya nodded her agreement, mulling over the counselor's advice. Was there a way to proverbially close your eyes without taking them off the viewscreen while you piloted the ship? She would have to give it some thought. The deep breath, at least, she knew was doable. "Yeah, I can do that," she added in support of her nod. "When do you think we should meet next?"

The counselor rocked back slightly and took a look at his PADD. He mused for a short moment before speaking. “Why don’t we plan for three weeks from now, I see you have some time in the morning. We could do a breakfast?” He offered a setting outside of his office, something he’d found interestingly successful at helping people feel comfortable in the past .

Irynya nodded and offered the counselor a small smile. "Breakfast sounds great." She paused a moment and then sensing the close of the session she unfolded herself from the pillow, cup in hand, and sipped the last contents of her tea before returning it to the replicator for recycling. She took a deep breath and then turned back to the counselor with a look of appreciation. "And now, back to work," she said.

The Doosodarian man smiled and pulled himself into a standing position. “Enjoy the rest of your day Lieutenant. I’m looking forward to our breakfast, but I’m sure we’ll run into each other before then.” His smile persisted as he walked her towards the door. “See you soon.” He spoke with sincerity.

A Post By

Lieutenant Irynya
Chief Helmswoman

Lieutenant Axod Qo
Chief Counselor